Staring Monday, June 2nd I am taking on the blog challenge of writing everyday. It feels good because I have no great intention behind it and no expectations. Just for fun and joy. I have been writing since I was a little girl but I have never considered myself a writer. I am a songwriter but for some reason I consider that different than being a writer. But guess what, its all the same. I accidentally wrote a book and self-published it. It came on like a tornado out of the blue and the words flowed out effortlessly. I have had that experience with a song but never thought a book would come out that way. I finished that book within a week’s period of time from start to finish. Writing for hours, up until 5 in the morning some days. It was fun. The challenge came when it was done and I thought okay I am going to market this book. Well that’s a whole other ballgame. I am not a marketer, I am a writer. But I am happy that book was written. I also have another book in the works that I have been writing since 2003 when I lived in New York City. The idea came out of the blue and every time I go to write in that book I have no idea where its going. I just show up and my muse appears and she writes. It has been an amazing process. Um? I think I’ll let her write everything and get out of the way. what a thought………
Once again I’ve decided it would be fun to write a blog everyday and babble on about whatever.
Today, I think about creativity for me and I love the process of writing a song or writing in my book. When I am in the flow the whole world disappears. I am blissed out. But everyday there is this struggle to even get myself to the paper. It is a battle in the mind. I think it is wrought with fears of “it won’t be good enough”, a thought pattern from my childhood. I can tend towards measuring and competing with those that I think are the super talents and it stops me from showing up for myself. Well the fact that I am here today writing this little blog is cool cause it is proof that I am showing up….at least today at this moment. Yeah! Fun. It is a funny thing to me that many artists no matter what genre have difficulty getting to what they love and of course that is a blanket statement.
I knew a guy in New York who was a concert pianist at Julliard School of music and he would practice for at least 8 hours a day, but every time I saw him it was at a bar and he was drunk out of his mind and he would talk to me about how miserable his life was and the pressure from school and his family to be the best. Of course that is an extreme example. When I was a kid I was obsessed with singing and would sing and write everyday just for the sake of it. As an adult I began putting a price tag on it because I chose it as my career. I think the trick is to get back to that childlike state of mind and just have plain old fun. I go back and forth with this all the time.
I am writing this, not to get advice but just to share. If you would like to share your experience that would be cool!